Theory of Sartorial Polarity. People tend to distinguish, rather simplistically, between trousers, or pants, and skirts on the one hand and, well, let us say suits, or zippersuits, and dresses on the other hand. That is, they distinguish on a kind of polar basis between skirts and trousers or dresses and suits, which is all very well. But I believe it is rather more complicated than that, not least in respect of the phenomenal distinction, germane to corporeal relativity, between pants and skirts and, by contrast, the noumenal distinction, germane to ethereal absolutism, between suits, especially zippersuits, and dresses. For it should not have escaped one’s attention that there is a kind of class distinction between pants and skirts vis-à-vis suits and dresses, both of which categories would logically lend themselves to our axial compass (see preceding entries) in which the noumenal and the phenomenal constitute polarities on either a state-hegemonic/church-subordinate basis or a church-hegemonic/state-subordinate basis, depending on the axis. Therefore if, in relation to these axes, we distinguish between, say, space and antitime at the northwest point of the compass in question and, equally, between mass and antivolume at its southeast point where state-hegemonic/church-subordinate criteria are concerned, it behoves us to likewise distinguish between, say, dresses and antisuits in the one case and pants and antiskirts in the other case, this being in effect a distinction between noumenal sensuality and phenomenal sensibility where the hegemonic factors (space/dresses and mass/pants) are concerned and, conversely, between what could be called noumenal antisensibility and noumenal antisensuality where the subordinate factors (antitime/antisuits and antivolume/antiskirts) are concerned, so that we could be distinguishing, in effect, between flouncy dresses and flared suits (antisuits) on the one hand and, conversely, between tapering pants and tapering skirts (antiskirts) on the other hand. Likewise, if in relation to church-hegemonic/state-subordinate criteria we distinguish between, say, volume and antimass at the southwest point of the axial compass and, equally, between time and antispace at its northeast point, it behoves us to likewise distinguish between, say, skirts and antipants in the one case and suits and antidresses in the other case, this being in effect a distinction between phenomenal sensuality and noumenal sensibility where the hegemonic factors (volume/skirts and time/suits) are concerned and, conversely, between what could be called phenomenal antisensibility and noumenal antisensuality where the subordinate factors (antimass/antipants and antispace/antidresses) are concerned, so that we could, in effect, be distinguishing between flouncy skirts and flared pants (antipants) on the one hand and, conversely, between tapering suits, or zippersuits, and tapering dresses (antidresses) on the other hand. Therefore far from a simple distinction between, say, pants and skirts or, up above, suits and dresses, we find that, with state-hegemoninc/church-subordinate axial considerations, an unequivocally hegemonic dress in noumenal sensuality will correlatively justify an unequivocally subordinate antisuit in noumenal antisensibility, as between metachemical and antimetaphysical factors respectively commensurate with space and antitime, whereas equivocally hegemonic pants, or trousers/jeans, in phenomenal sensibility will correlatively justify an equivocally subordinate antiskirt in phenomenal antisensuality, as between physical and antichemical factors respectively commensurate with mass and antivolume. Similarly, where church-hegemonic/state-subordinate axial criteria are at stake, we shall find that an equivocally hegemonic skirt in phenomenal sensuality will correlatively justify equivocally subordinate antipants in phenomenal antisensuality, as between chemical and antiphysical factors respectively commensurate with volume and antimass, whereas an unequivocally hegemonic suit in noumenal sensibility will correlatively justify an unequivocally subordinate antidress in noumenal antisensuality, as between metaphysical and antimetachemical factors respectively commensurate with time and antispace. Therefore while flared suits, or boilersuits and/or zippersuits, are the type of the antisuit par excellence under the type of the dress par excellence, which is a flouncy affair, tapering skirts are the type of the antiskirt par excellence under the type of pants, or trousers and/or jeans, par excellence, which is a tapering affair. Likewise while flared pants, or trousers and/or jeans, are the type of the antipants par excellence under the type of the skirt par excellence, which is a flouncy affair, tapering dresses are the type of the antidress par excellence under the type of the suit par excellence, which is a tapering affair. Doubtless we can and should distinguish between straight with turn-ups and straight without turn-ups in pants and suits, as though between an intermediate realm moderately sensual in the one case and moderately sensible in the other case, as well, no doubt, as between straight with slit and/or pleats and straight without slit and/or pleats in skirts and dresses, with similar moderate sensual and sensible implications that would further complicate the above theories in respect of intermediate criteria coming in between flouncy and tapering antitheses. But, that said, such straight alternatives would still qualify for estimation as either dresses/antisuits and pants/antiskirts on the one axial hand or, conversely, as skirts/antipants and suits/antidresses on the other axial hand, if to a proportionately less extreme degree. Which would be typical of liberal criteria in between more radically sensual and sensible, outer and inner alternatives, just as relativistic suits, with jacket and trousers, are much less radical than zippersuits or even boilersuits from a properly noumenal, and therefore absolutist, point of view. Could it be, I wonder, that the future will witness an increase in the use of tapering zippersuits or perhaps even velcrosuits in relation to tapering dresses as the most appropriate attire for the northeast point of the axial compass, the point commensurate, after all, with godliness and antidevilishness, according to gender, and hence with a distinction, elementally speaking, between metaphysical and antimetachemical criteria?