FREE-ELECTRON
SEXUALITY
"I must say, I'm
fascinated by this theory of yours, Terry, that homosexuality corresponds to a
pseudo-electron equivalent," the professor remarked, turning a pair of
seemingly enlightened eyes in my direction.
"A kind of higher materialist petty-bourgeois
sexuality."
The professor's wife smiled deferentially through prim
lips. "And one that apparently
compliments the higher spiritual petty-bourgeois sexuality of pornographic
indulgence, which corresponds, by contrast, to a free-electron
equivalent," she averred, showing herself to be no mean learner either.
I nodded confirmatory encouragement and waited for one or other
of them to continue.
"A homosexual materialist and a pornographic
spiritualist," the professor mused, smiling to himself. "Why, one might alternatively expect
homosexuality to appeal more to LSD trippers and pornography, by contrast, to
the practitioners of transcendental meditation, seeing as one can distinguish,
in each case, between a pseudo-electron and a free-electron indulgence!"
The professor's wife cast me an admiring and vaguely expectant
look. "Then one ought to argue that
anti-artists who produce a pseudo-electron literature would be partial to
homosexuality, while their free-electron counterparts, the pure poets, would
prefer pornographic sexuality," she remarked, as though it were an
everyday occurrence.
I nodded again, this time, however, in an attempt to express
the most unequivocally tacit endorsement of the good lady's argument.
"Well, if that's the case," the professor responded,
turning towards his wife, "one ought to equate avant-garde classical music
with a homosexual bias, since Terry tells us that such music conforms to a
pseudo-electron status, while reserving for modern jazz an equation with a
pornographic bias in view of the fact that it conforms, so we are told, to a
free-electron status."
The professor's wife smiled her guarded approval of this
suggestion through newly moist lips.
"And one might just as well contend that avant-garde painting
pertains, in its pseudo-electron status, to the homosexual side of things, in
contrast to light art which, through its free-electron integrity, suggests an
affinity with pornography."
I nodded my affirmation of this further contention and
remarked: "Yes, there is definitely a logical consistency about all this;
though one shouldn't forget that in a relatively post-atomic civilization
things are also relative within themselves, not just across the board with
regard to, say, the distinction between avant-garde classical and modern
jazz. These two art forms are also
relative - as between a steady rhythmic root and notational pitch expansions in
the case of avant-garde classical, and between flexible rhythmic accompaniment
and improvisatory pitch expansions in the case of modern jazz. Although we can speak of the one as essentially
a pseudo-electron equivalent and the other as a free-electron equivalent, there
is a proton side to the first and a pseudo-electron, or neutron, side to the
second, in accordance with their respective extreme relativities. And the same of course applies to the
distinction between avant-garde painting and light art, art forms which divide
into sub-relativities between canvas and abstract painting in the context of,
say, abstract expressionism, and between plastic tubing and neon lighting in
the context of light art - in other words, between a subordinate materialistic
and a dominating spiritualistic ingredient, the ratio of the one to the other
varying with the type of art and/or artist in question. Needless to say, each art form, whether
painterly or post-painterly, is divisible, within relative civilization, into
antithetical atomic biases, so that we can differentiate between
pseudo-electron painting and free-electron painting in regard to abstract
expressionism and abstract impressionism (more usually known as post-painterly
abstraction), as well as between different types of light art, whilst at the
same time acknowledging that, in the relativity of these things, avant-garde
painting as a whole becomes a pseudo-electron equivalent in relation to light
art as a whole, which we can have no hesitation in describing as a
free-electron equivalent."
The professor and his wife stared penetratingly into my face,
as though at some art object, smiled their gratification for the privilege of
receiving such esoteric information, and nodded what appeared to be
simultaneous approval of my argument.
However, I could only continue: "Coming back to sex, we
will therefore note that both homosexuality and pornography are relative within
themselves, the one materially so, with regard to the relationship of two male
bodies, and the other spiritually so, with regard, as a rule, to either two
photographed participants of different sex and/or to one participant of female
sex whose body is either completely or partly on display, with particular
reference to her cun ..., I mean, vagina. Such is the way of things in an extreme
relative civilization, like
Both the professor and his wife
appeared quite astounded, their lips pursed and their heads gently shaking from
side to side. It seemed that this
speculative declaration was too far above them to be properly intelligible or
sympathetic to their manifestly petty-bourgeois mentalities, which, in any
case, could only relate to magazines and the employment, therein, of adult
models. Probably they would forget all
about it in due course!